We cry.
We sometimes cut.
We smoke.
Why?
We're all spoiled kids. They used to say that teenage days are amazing. It is but there's this one point where all of us had once broke down or once experienced heartaches. We're all used to that. It is just right there in our souls. Always. We could never run from that.
There's always joy behind this pain but when the joy started to darken your days.. You're done. You feel like you don't worth anyone nor anything. You want to end this bullshit so you rather put yourself on risks to stop the pain that has been knocking your emotions. Suicide is the best thing on mind. But no this is too much. You wanted to end that pain but why would you harm your lovely self? Keep on mind that you, yes you are precious, you have to learn loving yourself before loving others. Harming yourself won't make things better. Harming yourself won't bring you back to the one that you have always adored. So stop self-harming.
I, myself once experienced a very killing heartache. It hurts. It felt like there was a knife stabbing your heart over and over again. It was a constant nightmare. It was him. The one that I've always called as a buddy in everything.
He was warm.
He used to so decent.
He owned my other half.
There were never any frowns or sighs in his company. 18 months were beautiful. He showed me what it was to be happy, he was my best friend since I was 10. He never liked me anyway, but it was fine for me, as long as I can be his favorite pal. Things changed when we were 13. I stopped adoring him as the time didn't let us to see each other more often. But when we were 14, we entered the same tuition centre. We even planned to sit together. We started to become close again. And yes the wonderful feeling started to grow and he never failed to give me butterflies.
We had a fight because of a crappy reason. I still remember, I wanted a break for 5 days. He was sincere. And I was thinking, giving him a second chance? why not?
We were happier than before. He loved me and I loved him more. I hope he knew it. He was the best gift from God. He was my happy pill. He loved me for who I was. I was full of flaws but he fixed them. He was everything. I thought he was the one but we all made mistakes. I end up being strangers with him. It was no one's fault but mine I guess. And he chose the wrong step. There is nothing like us both. But what's past is past. He used to be my favorite boy but now I don't even talk to him. He's happy now with someone else. And I'm happy for him too. There were tons of memories made with him. I honestly loved him but what can I do. There is a girl out there who can shine his days brighter than I did. But I thank him for being the best partner, for everything.. Along from craddle to grave, everyone had experienced heartbreaks.
